As is the norm here, let's start with a poem and a work in progress.
You went outside.
Outside you found a dress.
Dress-ed and fed, are you?
You have been confused.
Confused about your personality.
Personality that is Borderline
Borderline Personality Disorder.
Disorder compared to other people.
People do not understand.
Understand the pain, the confusion.
Confusion that is constant,
Constant fear of what...?
What it's like to be me.
Me in a crisis, me as normal.
Normal state, what is that?
That strange feeling of being unworthy.
Unworthy to be loved,
Loved for who and, what?
What you have become.
Become the person you know,
Know how to be,
Be yourself and love,
Love only You.
It has been one of those weeks where things are felt intensely, emotions are blurted out uncontrollably, and you still find solace in other people.
Thank you my friends, you are amazing.
Family, I love you, but you're making me sad.
Family, I love you. But you're making me what I do not want to be.
Family, I love you, but I felt emotionally unsafe in your company.
Family, I love you, but you're making me mad.
Easter weekend where I lost it. I did. And it's all shattered now, there isn't much to be done apart from letting time go by.
I have Borderline Personality Disorder, whatever that means.
I am also a woman, learning to live with her intuition, dreams and fears.
I am not special, yet people say I'm entitled.
I am rather chill, yet I've heard that I have become an angry person.
You know what, maybe I have.
I suffer from chronic pain in my knees,
And in my brain.
I am far from normal.
Normal ≠ Special.
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